I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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