I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
