We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
