i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
