My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
