week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
