Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize
