i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
