a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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