just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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