cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
