yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
