He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
