how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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