I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
