i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
The struggles of a small town man whore
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
