When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Randomize
