I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I need to calm my uterus...
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
