so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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