I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
