We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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