escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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