I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Randomize
