Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
