I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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