You're so nebulous sometimes
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
