you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
