Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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