Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
