I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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