if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
