i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
