My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
