i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
