My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
