He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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