part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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