Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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