So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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