Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
