his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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