Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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