There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
