Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
