i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
