I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
