that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
sarcasm needs its own font
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
