period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
My life is pants optional.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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