Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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