I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
